rebness: (Darko)
rebness ([personal profile] rebness) wrote2006-12-08 12:23 pm

Guh

I don't know what the hell is up with my brain lately. I've been on a terrible reading kick, devouring newspapers and books and fanfic like there's no tomorrow. And at night, when I'm trying to sleep, or when I'm at work, for God's sake, a thousand different ideas seem to be going through my brain for stories and articles and fics, which is all well and good.

Except that when I go to write them down, my mind goes blank.

Actually, that's a lie. It doesn't go blank. I just don't feel that I can put what's in my head onto paper adequately. It's annoyingly manic, and I'd be worried it was a symptom of some wanky bipolar-esque disorder, but my mood's absolutely fine. I just feel a profound disappointment that I'm writing stuff and it is absolutely crap and amateurish when I look at it. It's fine being all verbose, but I believe Orwell was right when he said writing should be clear, concise, simple. Maybe I should just spill out the purple prose, then ruthlessly edit it. Except I'm awful at editing. And then I'll ask for a beta/editor and take ten years to get back to them, because I have to edit before the editor sees it, so it's a vicious circle where nothing gets resolved.

Shoot me plzkthnx.

[identity profile] saffronlie.livejournal.com 2006-12-08 10:10 pm (UTC)(link)
I meant self-editing, sorry. The editing that you do all the time, from the first draft onwards, that lets you fine-tune your vision. As long as you have this fear of it coming out all wrong, then you'll block yourself completely, as you can see. Nothing will come out perfect the first time and you'll have to come to terms with that privately before you can move forward in your writing. I'm trying really hard not to sound snotty or bossy, but honest to God, I'm being sincere. I've seen others go through this similar kind of self-sabotage and it can be overcome.

[identity profile] rebness.livejournal.com 2006-12-08 11:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Dude, don't worry. What you're saying makes sense. 'Self-sabotage' is probably the most apt description... why it's manifesting itself in this way now, I don't know, but it's not a good thing to have developed and yeah, I'll have to try and overcome it. Perhaps if I threaten my brain with a bottle of wine, it'll stop acting up.

[identity profile] avariecaita.livejournal.com 2006-12-09 07:30 am (UTC)(link)
Srsly, you should've just buckled down and done NaNo. This is EXACTLY why it's the greatest invention on earth. After, like, the wheel. And jet engines. And condoms. Okay, there are lots of things in front of NaNo, but for you, specifically, it could be higher on your list!

Get your Aquarian Principles (copyright pending) and toss them out the window. Then sit yourself down and type rubbish. Type lots of rubbish. Much like I'm doing in this comment. When you're done -- when your fingers are bleeding -- then you go back and delete out all the crap. You might be deleting 95%, but it's the remaining 5% that's important here. Cherish that 5% and then go and have its literary babies in another 5%. Sooner than you think you'll have something you're proud of and want to share with others. And Spacky, I've written so many pages of pure shite and I've shared them with you. Share your shite with me! Who knows what two water-bearing minds might come up with!