rebness | (no subject)

(no subject)

Yesterday in work, the bosses were all out, so we sat painting our nails, reading magazines and er...talking politics. Was asked if I was going to vote Labour, said I wasn't and was then asked why.

Ten minutes later, my colleague frowned. "Becky, you're just so cynical." It's telling that I took this as a compliment, but feh.

I was watching Doctor Who tonight, that nice all-round family show of old. At one point, an evil dalek (huzzah!) escaped from a secret US base and decided to plug itself in for a nice recharge, taking all the electricity from Utah. Or something.

"Not just that," gasped Dr. Who, "it's downloaded the entire internet! It now knows everything!"

"Ha, yes!" I said, before I could bite the words back, "it can put all those Orlando Bloom slashfics to good use!"

"A what fic?" asked my mum.

"Er...nothing."

I dunno. The idea of a dalek wheeling around screaming "SPERMINATE" just tickles me somehow. Less cynical than just sick. >:)

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I MISSED DR WHO AFUCKINGGAIN!

DAMNM DAMN AND DOUBLE DAMN!

I am a wimp I was so sad at the Dalek dying and so happy when Chris Eccleston was sans shirt but that is another matter).

Tis true if the Daleks - or anyone - downloaded the entire net they would just be full of filthy notions and ideas. I like the sound of that!

XD!

You rule. *imagines Dalek formulating plans to take over using what it knows from slashfic*

You still online? We need Armand and Marius the good father figure funniness.

I am indeed, Jen. Mail heading your way!

AND IT WAS GREAT!

I was sad about the dalek, too. :(

What could the dalek utilise? Porn, conspiracy theories, fics and...more porn. Brilliant!

I would think it was all those Mary-Sue style fics out there in the ether with their incredibly beautiful heroines getting their man that is more the worry. If MS fic don't blow the Dalek's circuits it could be used as a weapon. They would recite them like Vogon poetry for hours on end and drive their victims insane, their brains entirely rotted away. *g*

LMAO!!

Bwahahahaaa!

Permission to metaquote?

Yes, if you like.

Imagine the deep dark threat of Mary Sue quotes hovering over you. You would do anything, anything to stop the pain. Or at least the helpless falling down laughing at the stupidity of it all.

If I were the dalek, I think I'd throw myself down the stairs.

But Daleks like Vogons have no sensibility or taste whatsoever, they are protected from the effects of Mary Sues.

Daleks and Vogons must be the only two races in the universe who don't see red at Mary Sues, then. Except maybe Mary herself, who will of course have as much sense as the Dalek has feeling.

Well I think there will have to be a UN Commission set up to investigate fan.fiction.net with its greating steaming piles of the stuff stored there for posterity. What is the half-life of toxic MS fic, I wonder? They should have to declare that site and its contents as a potential Weapon of Mass Destruction of Mental Health (WMDMH). But then Dubya and Blair would send off hit squads to eliminate the producers of these toxic materials, just in case the Daleks invade.

Horrible to see all those starry-eyed pubescent girls wiped out or sent to Guantanomo to sit and contemplate their offences. Could you imagine the total combined brain power well, maybe not so much brain power as weirded out fan-girrrrl power in one part of the planet. Their guards would demand that they be released as they whined for their PCs so they could continue on with the Greatest Romantic-est Fic in the Universe! Wheeeee! But no wipe them out I say, better for the health of the Planet Earth.

But if they must perish, they'll be Tragic Heroines, and you know how Marys feel about Dying Tragically, Surrounded by Flowers and Weeping Men. *Shudder*

Aaargh! I've created the story-line for Mary-Sue tragic death sequence. I must go and shoot myself!

*giggles madly*

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