Nul Points

Bah, zut alors, scheisse, mierda, etc!

Annual tack-fest the Eurovision Song Contest aired last night, and all across Europe people switched on their television sets to cheer proudly (I think) or sit back with bemused cynicism (pretty much all of the UK.)

Eurovision is one of my favourite television events of the year. It's a parade of terrible costumes, cheesy dialogue, pathetic songs, political voting... and Terry Wogan. The Irish commentator always casts a cynical air over the proceedings, whether confiding that he needs to go and lie down in a darkened room after a terrible song, or warning us before the French entry 'don't be afraid of the bald woman on stilts."

Yes. It's that bad.

And each and every single year, I sit back to laugh at this silly show. And each year, when bloody Romania and Greece and Cyprus and the Ukraine and so on all vote for each other whilst Britain, France, Germany and Spain try to, you know, vote for the best song, I find myself shouting in annoyance at the screen. Thus, the Ukraine, with a pathetic song, won first place.



I bet it wasn't anything to do with those Xena-esque costumes and all that dancing. Nuh-uh.

For what it's worth, I really liked the Serbian entry. The Greek was okay. Ours was rubbish. But at least we didn't get nil points this time-- and that's what counts.

Roll on Eurovision 2005!