I wanna, I wanna, I wanna zig-a-zig-ah

[rebness]

The Guardian has an awesome debate going on right now, attempting to find the worst song lyrics ever. It´s still open for anyone who wants to post, but some of the submissions really bring on the lulz. Rhyming ´toast´ and ´ghost´, indeed.

Caring about the lyrics to a song is one of those weird things that makes one feel adrift from society. Why be so bothered that the Pussycat Dolls unleashed their latest massacre of the English language? Does Paul Simon being a better lyricist than Las Ketchup make him cooler in the public eye? Noes, alas.

My brother firmly insists that songs don´t need to have good lyrics, that lyrics are just incidental words getting in the way of a tune. I believe the opposite: lyrics can make a song. Sometimes a song doesn´t reach out to me much at first, but the lyrics can make the difference. If I hear a particularly good lyric, I often rewind the song on my mp3 player or what have you to listen again. The plaintive refrain in If You Tolerate This, for example, that wonders "is it maybe shame/at being so young and being so vain" always gets me. It means something to me on a personal level and listening to this song is like being slapped. I struggle to explain this properly, but I mean that the combination of that beat and those saddened, dark lyrics gives me a few minutes of so many different emotions and thoughts because the power of music and the power of words can be overwhelming when joined like that.

That´s not to say lyrics completely ruin a song. God knows Shakira´s lyrics are infamously nuts, but I could listen to her music all day because of the sheer energy and fun of her songs. I love the beat to Oasis´ The Importance of Being Idle, but I try not to think about the lyrics because it´s disappointing to listen for a message and instead get simplistic rhyming.

Oasis songs often sound marvellous, but the sheer stupidity of the lyrics really gets me:

She´s got a sister
And God only knows how I´ve missed her
And on the palm of her hand is a blister
And I need more time

Criticising 50 Cent lyrics is like shooting fish in a barrel, but: I´ll take you to the candyshop/Let you lick my lollipop has to be one of the most inept, predictable lyrics ever written.

Finally, I have to admit that I rather like some Jennifer Lopez songs, but though this lyric isn´t inherently stupid, the rhyming scheme is just all wrong and Lopez actually seems to stumble when speaking the second lengthy line:

So much time you wasted
That´s why I had to replace you

I´m not saying that lyrics need to be written by someone with a degree in the arts, that they have to reference Derrida or Socrates, but geez, save us from Babe, I´d swim the deepest ocean/climb the highest mountain/girl/you´re my babe.

Comments

[zhonghua2000.livejournal.com]

MMMBop, ba dubi dop ba do bop,
Ba dubi dop ba do bop,
Ba dubi dop ba do. Oh yeah. ;P

Er... I wasn't sure how to address this entry because there's just so many! I must admit though, the first time I heard that 50 Cent song, I covered Jessica's baby ears with my hands.

[rebness.livejournal.com]

In the manner of a panicked cat in a Cat Macro, IT'S A TRAP!

I am not touching the Mmmbop thing with a 1,000 ft. bargepole. :p

Dear Lord, now I'm imagining all those innocent children wanting to check out Fiddy's lollipop...

The worst, or silliest anyway, song lyrics ever

[moon-chylde.livejournal.com]

MacArthur Park

Spring was never waiting for us dear
It ran one step ahead
As we followed in the dance

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet, green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, nooooo

I recall the yellow cotton dress
Foaming like a wave
On the ground beneath your knees
The birds like tender babies in your hands
And the old men playing chinese checkers by the trees

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet green icing flowing down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to bake it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, nooooo

[Instrumental Interlude]

MacArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet green icing flowing down
Someone left my cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'Cause it took so long to make it
And I'll never have that recipe again
Oh, nooooo

Re: The worst, or silliest anyway, song lyrics ever

[gairid.livejournal.com]

Okay...I had completely blocked that one from memory...yowza! I still think the Steve Miller one I posted is horrible, though.

Re: The worst, or silliest anyway, song lyrics ever

[moon-chylde.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that one by Steve Miller is pretty bad. But I had to do MacArthur Park because I remember a few years ago Dave Barry did a contest for the worse song. And MP won. That column he wrote about the search for the winner was hilarious. It's in a book of his that I have. Soooo many bad songs are mentioned.

Re: The worst, or silliest anyway, song lyrics ever

[rebness.livejournal.com]

LMAO! I need to find that book.

Re: The worst, or silliest anyway, song lyrics ever

[moon-chylde.livejournal.com]

The book is called Dave Barry is Not Making This Up. It a collection of his funniest columns and you will laugh yourself sick.

Oh. Now I want to read it again. I love his stuff and wish he would start writing again.

[saffronlie.livejournal.com]

The awful truth is that song lyrics mean nothing without the music, unless they are, in rare cases, good enough to work as stand-alone poetry. Emos who post whole songs uncut, take note: we have no idea what you're trying to say.

[rebness.livejournal.com]

Well, yeah. That's my point. I mean, I adore Franz and shizz, but Take Me Out isn't powerful as a piece of writing. It's a simplistic metaphor, but add the guitar and dragging drum sound and it's turned into something different altogether.

I agree wholeheartedly on the emo post thing, though. The words are dead on the screen... renders the whole thing pointless. And extra emo.

[saffronlie.livejournal.com]

It's a metaphor? You're gonna have to explain that one to me, someday.

*wince*

[gairid.livejournal.com]

The lyric that annoys the PISS outta me is this one (bolded part is the WORST. UGH!):

Take The Money and Run
(Steve Miller)

This here's a story about Billy Joe and Bobbie Sue
Two young lovers with nothin better to do
Than sit around the house, get high, and watch the tube
And here is what happened when they decided to cut loose

They headed down to, ooh, old El Paso
Thats where they ran into a great big hassle
Billy Joe shot a man while robbing his castle
Bobbie Sue took the money and run

Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run

Billy Mack is a detective down in texas
You know he knows just exactly what the facts is
He aint gonna let those two escape justice
He makes his livin off of the peoples taxes

Bobbie Sue, whoa, whoa, she slipped away
Billy Joe caught up to her the very next day
They got the money, hey
You know they got away
They headed down south and theyre still running today
Singin' go on take the money and run
Go on take the money and run

Re: *wince*

[rebness.livejournal.com]

Wow. That song's all kinds of special. :|

[scrr.livejournal.com]

This one, however, I really LIKE... The songs on this album all ramble somehow, but in a Tom Waits kind of way they work anyway.

I'm Going To Stop Pretending That I Didn't Break Your Heart Lyrics
(Eels)



I'm gonna tell you what you need to hear
And i'm a little too late
By three or four years
And it may not make much sense
Now that we are apart
But i'm going to stop pretending
That i didn't break your heart

You see i never thought enough of myself
To realize that losing me could mean
Something like the tears in your eyes
And i want to tell you i'm sorry
And it's too late to start
But i'm going to stop pretending
That i didn't break your heart

And it's christmas eve
Years down the line
Sitting here wishing i'd treated you better
When you were mine
And i have no way of knowing where you are
But i'm going to stop pretending
That i didn't break your heart

I didn't mean to hurt you
I didn't know what i was doing
But i know what i have done

[rebness.livejournal.com]

Good lyrics. I'm going to have to do a Favourite Lyrics post, methinks. >:)

[airiddh1.livejournal.com]

*whistles* we'll not talk about Bowie's lyrics...


I'm an alligator, I'm a mama-papa coming for you
I'm the space invader, I'll be a rock 'n' rollin' bitch for you
Keep your mouth shut, you're squawking like a pink monkey bird
And I'm busting up my brains for the words

Keep your 'lectric eye on me babe
Put your ray gun to my head
Press your space face close to mine, love
Freak out in a moonage daydream oh yeah!..............

[rebness.livejournal.com]

But he's The Bowie! He has a special pass to awesomeness...

[airiddh1.livejournal.com]

well you won't get any arguement from me there!!!! (and I LOVE that song BTW!!!LOL)

[pandorasblog]

I expect to see Sting high on the Guardian's list. People always bring up the shake and cough/Nabakov thing in "Don't Stand So Close To Me", and there have been some other clangers. He gets a pass in my book because of the (often under-appreciated) brillance of many of his other lyrics (most of all, "De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da", because when you get past that one repeated line, it is, as its author put it, an articulate song about being inarticulate). But really, Sting... couldn't you have got that "Lolita" reference in some other way?

Oh well... I don't suppose I'll complain too loudly when I see them in Dublin. XD

oh brother...

[t-illusion.livejournal.com]

There are no excuses for..

Aqua - Barbie Girl

I'm a barbie girl, in the barbie world
Life in plastic, it's fantastic!
you can brush my hair, undress me everywhere
Imagination, life is your creation

or Vanilla Ice and Ice Ice Baby

Ice ice baby (x2)
All right stop collaborate and listen
Ice is back with my brand new invention
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Flow like a harpoon daily and nightly
Will it ever stop yo I don't know
Turn off the lights and I'll glow
To the extreme I rock a mic like a vandal
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle

And last but definitely not least...

50 Cent Go, go, go, go
Go, go, go shorty
It's your birthday
We gon' party like it's yo birthday
We gon' sip Bacardi like it's yo birthday
'Cause you know we don't give a fuck
It's not your birthday!


It's so bad you wish you were blind and deaf