Another day, another doll... pound

[rebness]

Dear crazy patient,

No, your rectal bleeding was not caused by drinking tap water. It is, if you would allow me to venture my humble opinion, your recent diagnosis of haemorrhoids. No, THE WATER DID NOT CAUSE THE HAEMORRHOIDS. Get off the phone. Off. No, water's not bloody abrasive! No, I won't call the consultant to ask him if he'll recommend you get a grant for bottled water.

No love,

Becky

And that, folks, is how I spent the last half an hour of my day. I thought I wasn't working in Mental Health at the moment.

Comments

[wiebke.livejournal.com]

Back when I was webmaster for the state public health department, I would have to answer emails and there definitely were weird and delusional people writing us. We'd also get emails from people with medical emergencies (i.e. bleeding, infections, flu, etc.) asking us for information or assistance when it was quite obvious they should be calling a doctor, local clinic, etc. rather than writing the state health department!

[zhonghua2000.livejournal.com]

No, I won't call the consultant to ask him if he'll recommend you get a grant for bottled water.

I should totally call you during the workday on the FTS (Free Federal Telephone Service) so we can compare notes and laugh our bums heads off. >:)